Friday, September 15, 2006

Mrs. Hyde Is On A Roll

Mrs. Hyde has been visiting this week. Who is Mrs. Hyde? Well, she's the 'other' personality I've seemed to develop this year. Mrs. Hyde takes no crap. She speaks her mind, especially when she's ticked off about something. Doesn't matter if it's just a minor infraction, you tick her off, you get an ear beating and if looks could kill, she'd be serving a life sentence. Why am I speaking of her in the third party? Well, she took the day off. It's only me here today. The nice one. The meek little mousie.
Mrs. Hyde might have taken the day off, but she looks out for me and she gets any inkling that someone, anyone, is giving me a hassle she's back in a flash.
Two days ago she was here. I wasn't expecting her. I never am. I was cleaning house, my bedroom to be specific. I was dusting and my 3 year old grandson wanted to help me, so I sprayed some furnture polish, gave him a clean dusting rag and he was a happy little camper. His grandpop was home that day, his day off. When he's home, Mrs. Hyde keeps a close watch on me. She knows I love to work on my crafts when I can, and I do love my computer. When grandpop is home though, I do try to control myself and I put a tight rein on my compulsions to craft and compute. This day I needed to clean out the computer room, where I store my crafting supplies, because we were switching our ISP to Comcast and someone was coming out the next day to install and I wanted to make sure he had 'room' to work. I needed to put the supplies somewhere and the most convenient location was our bedroom. It needed dusting and vacuuming so I did all that first. It was while the little guy was helping me that his grandpop came in the room to get something from his dresser. Now, if he had just got what he was looking for and left like a good husband, Mrs. Hyde wouldn't have come that day. But no. He had to open his pie hole ( that's what Mrs. Hyde would call it ) and talk.
grandpop: Are you helping gramma?
grandson: yep!
grandpop: Good boy! Gramma needs all the help she can get cause this house is a mess.
me: hey, I'm right here. I know it's a mess ( it really isn't, but I can't win this argument) and I'm doing some cleaning right now. (jerk) That's what Mrs. Hyde would have said.
grandpop: You're home ALL DAY. What do you do all day - oh, I know, craft and get on the damned computer. ( snorts )
me: (huffy) Hey, I do my computer stuff in the morning before the kids get here. Yeah, sometimes I craft too, because I need to spend the afternoon with the kids. When they leave you know I straighten up and vacuum. My heavy cleaning I do on the weekends.
grandpop. Yeah right.
me: Who the hell do you think does the laundry, the grocery shopping, cooking, dishes, windows, scrubbing floors, bathroom.......the maid?

Mrs. Hyde had an inkling my blood pressure was rising. She was watching and waiting.
Grandson had left by this time to dust in the living room. I didn't appreciate grandpop bringing up this old gripe in front of the kids anyway. Jerk. That was me, not Mrs. Hyde.

me: I'm not on a time clock and I don't like being told what to do and when to do it. I know what needs done and it gets done, when I feel like doing it. ( so there!)
grandpop: You would never make it out in the work world.

huh? I used to work when the kids were little and we needed the money because HE hurt his back and we were trying to save up for a house. It was his decision that I stop working when our 3rd daughter was born. Then I did childcare in our home for years which paid for all 3 girls to go to private schools. I had a time schedule. I rarely got a lunch break.

Mrs. Hyde was surfacing. Not here yet, but she was riding her broom at top speed. Grandpop would have been smarter just to leave then and there.

me: I'm my own boss.
grandpop: (startled a little) oh, you think so?

The floor shook, the windows rattled, a picture fell off the wall. She was here.

Mrs. Hyde: I know so. Now knock it off.
grandpop: don't tell me to knock it off.
Mrs. Hyde: I just did. And I'll say it again. Knock it off. NOW.

He stalks out of the room. But a few seconds later he yells from the kitchen.
grandpop: I work all day, come home and work some more and you sit on your ass all day. The least you could do is have a clean house, it's your JOB, you're the wife.
Mrs. Hyde: That's right I'm your wife and you're my husband, NOT my BOSS and not my FATHER so start acting like a husband.

That's as far as this went because he stormed down to the basement and I grabbed Mrs. Hyde by the throat and told her to leave NOW. She smirked and said 'oh I'll leave, but I'll be back. You can count on it'. She got on her broom and with a wink she took off to leave me to handle the mess. And I don't mean the housework.

It took 2 days for the dust to settle. I'm not getting any more dirty looks and I'm back to talking to grandpop without feeling hostile.

I know it's the menopausal moodswings and I do take Effexor XR for them - but I swear they are the reason Mrs. Hyde came to visit. And as she said....she'll be back. She's my Menopausal Monster. She's my new best friend.

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